Today, Palm Sunday, marks the beginning of Holy Week in the Christian Church. I wasn't raised in any particular religion, my mother having been a lapsed Catholic and my father never in any at all, as far as I know.
But I, during my quest to find my own path, have followed different paths of the Christian faith at various junctures in my life. The first overtly religious path I followed was as a teenager while my parents were living in Georgia. I joined the Episcopal Church and after a while, all of my siblings joined the church also. I loved the pomp and circumstance of the "high" Episcopal Church, with a choir and a priest (Father Shipps) who visited my family at our home and became a friend. I was just eighteen and had recently graduated from high school with no particular direction in my life. As I got more and immersed into the religious life, I flirted with the thought of becoming a nun and looked around for the convent with the coolest habits. (At my age that was the most important criterion for a suitable convent.)
Well, I didn't join any convent, and I went on to become pregnant out of wedlock soon after and was forced into a marriage I didn't want. That was what you did in those days if you got pregnant. Then motherhood and marriage became the center of my world, and my husband was what we called a "Holy Roller" at that time. I went to one of their Sunday observances and promptly stopped going to any church at all. My faith, however, never left me and I eventually joined the Unitarian Church, which was Christian without any of the ceremony, and I learned a great deal during that time in my life.
During my forties, I became quite religious again, and by this time I was living and working in Boulder. I discovered a Catholic convent just outside of town, the Abbey of St. Walburga, and would spend Holy Week there, praying and meditating in solitude. You could stay in a little room outside of the main convent and either have your meals brought to you or join the nuns for your meals. They were eaten in silence with one nun reading passages from the Bible, and the whole week was just bliss to me, being surrounded by the peace and tranquility of the convent.
On Thursday of Holy Week, the nuns would wash the feet of those of us staying at the convent. It was quite a moving ceremony. And I learned that Holy Saturday, the one full day between Good Friday and Easter Sunday, was the most hushed and silent day of them all. And then on Sunday morning, the joy and delight of all the nuns, who had stayed up all night to bake cookies and make Easter eggs, was so evident. Nineteen nuns lived there full time, and I toyed with the idea of doing what I began in my teens, but I didn't.
However, even though I don't attend church regularly, prayer and meditation are now part of my life, and sometimes I think of the nuns at St. Walburga and wonder how they are doing. They had a profoundly positive effect in my life.
:-)
Wow!! What a fantastic faith journey you have had! I can well imagine that your time in the convent affected you profoundly! I loved this post, and learning more about you!! Love you! Janine XO
ReplyDeleteI agree with SandS, you journey of faith is amazing. Thanks for sharing this with us DJan.
ReplyDeleteWow is right! You have had an incredible journey. I love the idea of spending Holy Week at a convent. Maybe one day in the future I'll get an opportunity to do just that. I did a Walk to Emmaus which goes from Thursday evening through Sunday morning. It was fabulous; the world and its intrusions were far, far away.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your experiences. God bless.
I was raised in the Anglican Church, and I love the "high" ceremonies as well. When I got married, my husband was Catholic, so I had to convert to Catholicism. When I was taking instructions, the priest said to me, "You will never make a good Catholic, you ask too many questions." I think that is what spirituality is all about -- questioning -- and it sounds as if you have had a similar journey.
ReplyDeleteI always loved the story of Palm Sunday, and it was my favorite when I was a little girl in Sunday School.
I think we could all do with a week in a convent or a monastery. The quiet and meditative atmosphere can only be good for us. I have never done it but I would like to do it. I think it would be very rewarding as an experience.
ReplyDeleteBlessings, Star
Interesting; I was raised Catholic, but I no longer go to any church, although I do pray and am a believer. I'm just not convinced that organized religion is the only option for faith.
ReplyDeleteOrganized religion, like anything organized by human beings, can tend to be full of problems, large and small, and having been suitably disenchanted at one point in my life, I proceeded for a number of years to avoid any kind of significant involvement with any congregation. But God wants us to grow spiritually, and if the Bible is clear about anything, it's that God can best work through us when we get out of our comfort zones, when we step into the wilderness to undertake uncertain and difficult journeys.
ReplyDeleteI love that Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a donkey. In those days, kings would ride stallions or donkeys, depending on the situation. A donkey meant he was coming in peace, and to bring peace.
What a neat experience. I turned away from organized religion quite early in life. I am spiritual but not religious. My mom was Catholic but wasn't a regular church goer..we went on Easter and Christmas and hurried up communion and confirmation attendance and that was it. When I was readying for first communion, a Catholic priest was drunk and tried to molest me ( I got away in time and nothing happened) but that really gave me a negative view of the trust in the organized church thing. My husband attended Catholic parochial school and hated it and is almost agnostic now and never wants to go to church..yet we are both very spiritual...if I had to choose my philosophy it would be Native American with respect and adoration for a Force and nature.
ReplyDeleteGlad you found what brings you peace. A beautiful journey. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeletexo
I was raised Catholic until 16. I would love to spend some time alone in a convent! I loved reading about your journey!
ReplyDeleteEpiscopalian, "Holy Roller", Unitarian... argh!!! As a Catholic who's lived in Catholic countries most of her life, I've never been able to tell the different Protestant churches apart! My knowledge is limited to historical schisms: Orthodox, the Lutherans and Calvinists and finally Anglicans. And I get the differences in applications of the faith from back in the 16th century when everyone split up (well the Orthodox a few centuries earlier), but now I'm completely LOST!!!
ReplyDeleteI guess you'd say I'm a lapsed Catholic, although not quite sure what that means. If the masses around here were half as vibrant and interesting as when I was a teenager in Mexico then I'd probably be going regularly again. As it is, I think the last time I attended Mass was at my Grandfather's funeral a couple of years ago (oh my!), and the next will be my cousins' first communion and a niece's baptism in 3 weeks...
But if I ever get married it WILL be within the Church, preferably by a Jesuit priest who's been a friend of my mother's since she was 15 (apparently she toyed with the idea of being a nun then and he talked her out of it saying she could only deal with it if she could start out as mother superior, lol!), and who flew down to Panama to baptize me when I was born.
Lent and Holy Week..more important I believe than Christmas..but of course it is not as commercial..and I still have to cook and be polite. Faith is a journey..it ebbs and flows just like a river, with spring thaws and winter freeze ups..as long as we have faith..God's Grace will see us through:)
ReplyDeleteWhat an awesome experience! I would love to do that. I love this Easter holiday at church. We have special services for Thursday and Friday, as well as our special Easter service. My journey took me far off the path, but I thank God that He never deserted me. He waited for me to come to Him. My faith is such an important part of my life now. I can't imagine ever going back to that other life...
ReplyDeleteI grew up in the church and am very thankful for that foundation. As an adult I have had a lot of trouble finding a church that doesn't make me shake my head, but I'd like to find one that I can take the kids to so that they can have that foundation.
ReplyDeleteWhen I hit college I began to ask a large number of questions and spent many a night with wine and philosophical conversation (what else is college for?). I have since learned that my beliefs of a fluid sort, they change as I change. However, that's what works best for me and harms no one else. I would like to give my children the same solid foundation of belief that I have as well as teach them to ask their own questions and trust the answers that speak to them.
Oh, I like the new layout! And we survived the night:)
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