Warning: Diva alert

Yesterday, my sister Norma Jean sent me this picture of Lexie, showing that this young lady is going to be dangerous in a couple of decades. Or sooner. Capturing hearts right and left, she's simply adorable! As many of you know, Lexie is my grand-niece, Norma Jean's only grandchild, and truly one of the New Generation. She was conceived using donor sperm and is being raised by a single parent, my niece Allison. I wrote all about it here. I was planning on editing the picture to remove the warning label, but after giving it some thought, I decided to use it as part of the title of this post.

Because of the wonders of technology, I get to see Lexie and her mom on video chat fairly often. She's a toddler now, smart as a whip, and growing by leaps and bounds. Since I talk with Norma Jean two or three times a week on iChat, we swap stories of our lives as well as pictures. She couldn't wait to show me this one. It's definitely a keeper, don't you think?

Today I met a new friend at the coffee shop. I was meditating on this picture while sipping my coffee, and a young dark-haired woman sat down in the adjoining chair. She's obviously in her early twenties, if not younger, and I was thinking about the passage of time, as I often do. Lexie is growing up so fast, but as she ages, so do I. The woman caught me staring at her, and she held my gaze, looking right back at me. I decided to start a conversation. "I was just wondering: when you look at me, do you see an old woman?" She studied me for a moment and shook her head. This began a conversation about how older people become invisible, and she introduced herself to me as Alana (or Ilana, I'm not sure of the spelling). She's indeed 21 and finished her education last fall, majoring in theater, which I find really interesting. I almost asked if I could take her picture for the blog, but instead I gave her my card and told her that if she's interested she could read what I write and even leave a comment if she wants.

Alana (I like that spelling) is working at the YMCA right now and is hoping to be accepted into the Peace Corps. I remember when that was something I considered doing, long ago, and she reminded me that I still can if I choose to. This began a conversation about travel; I am reluctant to travel any more, but she's looking forward to discovering the world and different cultures. She's at the beginning of her adventures, and I am content to be settling into my easy chair (after a good workout, of course).

It was time for me to catch the bus, so we said goodbye. I hope to see her again. What was most amazing to me is that during the conversation, her assurance and direct gaze made me feel I was in the presence of an old soul. Her image keeps creeping back into my mind. When I was her age, I was nowhere near as confident and self-assured as she is. The women's movement hadn't even begun in the early sixties when I was her age. It gives me confidence that we are indeed making some forward progress. Lexie, what will the world be like when YOU turn twenty-one?
:-)

Things are looking up

These tulips from last spring just made me smile, as I looked for a nice picture to dress up my blog post. Hope they do the same for you. Things are indeed looking up, since today the window on my car got fixed, I have a new bank account, and the insurance claim has been completed with my insurer. Although the replacement of the window didn't meet the deductible, it feels so NICE to have my car usable (and invisible) again. I also got my driver's license renewed and drove around today in my repaired car, the first day since "it" happened last Saturday. So yes indeed, I am feeling so much better today. My insurer even paid for the cost of the stolen chocolate bar.

Last night I also slept the best I have in days. Some of my blogging friends have real difficulty sleeping, so today I am feeling much more understanding, after two nights of anxious tossing and turning. Last night, however, I turned a corner, and today my life feels like it's getting back on track. I can actually start thinking about other things. I've learned some valuable lessons. Here are a few.

This kind of theft is increasing exponentially as people get more desperate. The thieves ALWAYS fill their car with gas as their first move. A red flag is when they fill two or three cars all at once. Women are often targeted, because they carry a purse and usually leave it in the car when exercising. They watch for that. The trunk is a better option, but the police told me if I leave valuables there that I place it BEFORE arriving at my destination, so that nobody sees me open the trunk. Covering your valuables with a coat or a pillow is also a red flag to the thieves.

Women in grocery stores are a target because they leave their purses in the basket as they peruse the shelves. This is when they will walk right up and take your purse while your back is turned. The policeman told me of a woman just today who accidentally left her wallet at Home Depot, and by the time she found where it was, more than $2100 had been charged to her account.

There are two kinds of theft: property and identity. Both are felonies, but identity fraud needs to be handled separately, since police cannot take your word for what happened, your bank needs to give you a detailed report of what happened with your cards so you can make a separate fraud report. The only important thing I still have to do is to get ahold of annualcreditreport.com and use their free report to find if anybody is trying to set up new accounts in my name. They offer a free 30-day fraud alert to make sure nobody is trying to steal my identity. That's my task for this week.

What I am hoping is that my misfortune will serve to warn some of my beloved community to protect yourself from this happening to you. The biggest shock I received today when I turned in the police report is to learn that here, in Bellingham, more than 40 to 50 of these thefts happen every single day! With the police departments being cut back, there are fewer and fewer enforcement officers to follow through to catch these criminals. They get away with it, sometimes until they must feel they are entitled to our stuff. What can we do to change this scary trend?

One of the most important things I've learned in the last few days is that yes, it's a violation of my life, but move on and do not let myself become a victim of identity fraud! The number of people who have told me of their own experiences makes me realize that suspicion is a more reasonable response than trust when somebody calls, or emails, or pretends to be offering something that seems too good to be true.

If you can convince me that this is the wrong choice, I'm all ears. You will be talking to a disillusioned Pollyanna...
:-{

Dangerous job as a maid

J Lo as maid

I have worked as a maid at various times in my life, out of necessity. Once when I arrived in a city with no money, I got a job making $2 an hour cleaning hotel rooms. And long ago when I first came to Colorado, I worked as a maid at a dude ranch cleaning rooms for the summer.

What has brought all this back to me is identifying with the poor young woman who was allegedly raped by Dominique Strauss-Kahn, the disgraced and deposed IMF Chief. The other night I woke up thinking about the awful scenario she experienced that was so graphically depicted in news accounts. If she had known what was going to happen to her, I suspect she would have said nothing and endured the horror of it for the rest of her life. Her previous existence, and that of her sixteen-year-old daughter, will never be the same. The press will never leave her alone.

I read that when she tried to return home after the story broke, dozens of reporters blocked her way into her own home. She and her daughter have been "relocated" to a secure place, but how can her life ever be the same? She has agreed to press charges and probably has little to no idea of the pressures she will most likely face once the trial begins. It just makes me sick. The only bright side to what might come from this is highlighting the numerous times this same situation has happened to other young women, who have little to no recourse if something similar happens to them.

Most of the press reports I've read focus on what will likely happen to his life after he was caught. But apparently this is not new behavior for him, since he is a powerful person who thought the rules didn't apply to him. Whatever he gets won't be adequate punishment, in my opinion, because of his disregard for the rights of others. He joins the ranks of men who have been disgraced because of their inability to keep it in their pants and exposed, so to speak, for their crimes.

While I was working as a maid, I was never accosted, but I didn't spend more than a few months in the position. Because I had other skills, I was able to get better paying and more secure positions. However, I well remember how invisible I was to the people as they were checking out of their rooms. Many times I felt like a piece of furniture and was told by management that it was my place to act like one. Maybe those old guys like DSK should get a blow-up doll fastened to their pillows instead of a chocolate. But who knows, maybe the turn-on for him was overpowering an unwilling and powerless woman...
:-[

International Women's Day

Happy International Women's Day 2010! Celebrated every year on the 8th of March, it is a major day of global celebration of women. In different regions of the world, the focus of the celebrations ranges from general respect, appreciation and love towards women to a celebration for women's economic, political and social achievements. In some places like China, Russia, Vietnam and Bulgaria, IWD is a national holiday. Unfortunately for us Americans, it's not a holiday. Yet. From my favorite information source, Wikipedia:

On the occasion of 2010 International Women's Day, the International Committee of the Red Cross is drawing attention to the hardship displaced women endure. The displacement of populations is one of the gravest consequences of today's armed conflicts. It affects women in a host of ways. Women displaced by armed conflict – often living alone with their children – are frequently exposed to sexual violence, discrimination and intimidation. Many face poverty and social exclusion as well. International humanitarian law therefore includes specific provisions protecting women, for example when they are pregnant or as mothers of young children.

That's something I have never had to worry about, being displaced by war. But this is a huge and very real problem for many women (and men, and families) across Africa and the Middle East, in particular. The movie The Hurt Locker shows what the Iraq war is like for many, including those whose lives are totally disrupted, or lost, by that awful war.

And it's fitting that on IWD Eve 2010 at the Oscars, Kathryn Bigelow was the first woman ever to win the Oscar for Best Director. I saw The Hurt Locker here at home on Netflix, and although I thought it was a really good movie, and although I am at a loss to know exactly what directors actually do, in my mind it wasn't nearly as good a movie as Avatar, or even Up in the Air, which won nothing.

But I think the main difference is, if I look carefully at my feelings, I would much rather live in Pandora than in Iraq. One movie was about the oneness of all things (although it had plenty of war scenes), and the other was about the horror of war (with plenty of war scenes). I saw almost all of the movies that were nominated, except for Precious and Inglourious Basterds, which I intend to correct as soon as I can. I do like to know what passes for great film these days. What do you think?
:-]