Sunday, May 12, 2013

Requiem for a bird

Five years ago, and last month
My fisherman friend Gene has lost his companion of more than two decades, his parrot Poopstain. On Friday I was sitting the coffee shop having my morning latte when Gene came in, obviously upset. I looked up at him and saw that the bird wasn't with him. I asked if he was okay, and he teared up and said the bird had died. He found him in the cage that morning and wasn't sure when he had finally passed away during the night.

We all knew that the bird wasn't well. He had a stroke or something similar about a year ago, when he stopped squawking constantly and stopped growing new feathers. I refer to the bird as "he" because Gene does, but a few years ago "he" laid and egg and Gene realized that the bird was female, but it was too late for Gene to make the transition in his own mind. The bird's behavior had also changed pretty drastically lately, with him sleeping more often and crawling under Gene's beard, where he obviously felt safe, instead of perched on his shoulder. Gene also got in the habit of wearing a shirt so that the bird could nestle under it, and he spent more and more time when outside huddled in the safety of Gene's beard and shirt. He made little noises like baby birds do, and we speculated that he had reverted in his old age to becoming a nestling again.

Gene said he thought it would be a relief when Poopers finally died, but you just don't lose a companion of more than twenty years without suffering a real loss. He said that he should just go home and clean everything up and bury him, but I reminded Gene that his girlfriend Paula has a relationship with the bird, too, and would need to have some closure. I sent Gene off to Paula's house and will find out on Monday what they finally did to lay the bird to rest.

I went looking for a card to give to Gene, but after perusing all the sympathy cards, nothing was appropriate, so here is my gift to the bird he loved: a blog post. Goodbye, little bird! May you fly free and squawk to your heart's content. You gave my friend Gene an awful lot of love.
:-}

31 comments:

  1. How lovely and touching your comments were DJan. I am sure your friend Gene and his girlfriend, yourself and everyone that was aquainted with PoopStain will feel the sadness of his loss. Do not know you Gene, but condolences on the loss of your pet. Nice tribute to the parrot DJan - your personal touch of condolence. lol

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  2. Gene and his girlfriend will appreciate your kind words and memories.

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  3. Oh how poignant this story is. I can't imagine how Gene must miss his feathered friend

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  4. Djan, I think this post is better than any card you could have found. It is a fitting memorial for Poopstain... and Gene will certainly appreciate it. And after 20 years, Poopers will still be there with him in spirit.

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  5. oh, bless him! i know he will miss that sweet companion.

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  6. awww...i want to give your friend gene a hug...its not easy to lose a friend like that...i am glad you were there for him....

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  7. Poor Poopstain flying off to the Rainbow Bridge..it is never easy to lose a much loved pet. Tell Gene he has my sympathy..I have enjoyed hearing about Poopstain over the years I have read your blog:)

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  8. What a touching post. It good you recognized the need to grieve in this situation, not just for himself but for others as well. I share your final wish for PoopStain.

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  9. Oh, how sad! I felt the same way when I had to leave my dog behind with friends when I left New York City for good.

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  10. Oh, such sweet sorrow. Nicely done, DJan. My heart goes out to Gene.

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  11. How sad to lose his companion. R.I.P little bird. Your post is a nice way to say goodbye. He will miss that bird a lot I'm sure.

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  12. You've created a lovely tribute, DJan, and you gave him good advice.

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  13. This is a touching tribute to the parrot and to the power of animals to become important family members.

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  14. My heart goes out to Gene and his girlfriend. In many ways, pets are closer to us than any other being in our lives, and the pain of their absence is a long time going.

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  15. What an amazing friend you are! A beautiful tribute to your friend and the pain he is surely feeling right now.

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  16. Wonderful tribute and I know your words will help. Shared pain is easier pain.
    Parrots live for such a long time and PoopStain was definitely family to them.
    I am so sorry.

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  17. Thank you. This is a beautiful post, and my heart is sore for Gene.

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  18. It's always a big loss when a cherished pet dies. My daughter put her schnauzer down a couple of weeks ago. we did find sympathy card that was sort of suitable. You gave your friend good advice.

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  19. There isn't store-bought card that can compare to this, my friend. This is a beautiful blog about man and friend...and the loss that one feels when one loses a friend. Beautifully written. My condolences to Gene and his girlfriend. The bird had a friend indeed in Gene...

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  20. A wonderful way to remember someone's special friend. Well done, DJan.

    Blessings and Bear hugs!
    Bears Noting
    Life in the Urban Forest (poetry)

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  21. Another idea is to get him a copy of Julie Zickefoose's book The Bluebird Effect: Uncommon Bonds With Common Birds. Not only terrific, but there's a story in there about her parrot Charlie that I think your friend will love.

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  22. What a fitting tribute to a long, lost companion.

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  23. Birds are special companions. We had a dusky conure for five years who was a real joy. She died during Hurricane Wilma. I feel for Gene. RIP, beautiful bird.

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  24. Having a pet is a contract with sorrow.

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  25. I am so sorry for your friend's loss. We had Parakeets and one day we put their cage on our deck so they can get an idea of our outdoors, then within an hour the cage opened and they were gone. I have no idea who would let loose our birds like that.

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  26. Oh poor Gene. Poopstain was clearly very much a part of him. I know the baby bird behaviour and see it from time to time in Frank's parrot, Lucy. You wrote a lovely tribute for the little feathered sweetie. I'm sorry for their loss.

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  27. The birds in the parrot family have such personality. He will really miss Poopstain. I hope they had a satisfactory last goodbye.

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  28. That is so sad. In twenty years I'm sure Gene and Poopers shared many adventures. Losing a companion after that length of time is hard. Your advise to visit his girlfriend was good DJan, that might help Gene get the closure he needs too.

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  29. Great name for a beloved bird. I know your friend will feel the loss of his companion so I hope he is around you and other friends to help him.

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  30. Dear DJan, this is a lovely tribute to Poopstain and also a tender grieving with your friend Gene. I lived with several cats and they have all become family to me. The one I lived with the longest was Eliza Doolittle. She died at the age of 20 years and five months. Her death devastated me, so I'm feeling sad for Gene, but what you said about his bird companion is so true. He/she can now know a freedom he's never known before. Peace.

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  31. This is such a beautiful post, DJan. How very sad for Gene. I didn't even realize that birds could live so long and become such wonderful companions.

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